Instagram Dreams

I can't believe I'm going to tell this story, but oh well. If you can't be honest and absolutely bat shit crazy on your own sliver of the internet, then where can you be? 

And no, I'm not talking about what I found in the microwave on Snapchat lastnight. Although that too was embarrasing.... for Gee. Poor little guy, so awkward. 

I woke up in the middle of the night totally in a panic. Or at least I thought I had woken up. It was one of those times when you think you've awaken from a dream, but it turns out you're dreaming about waking up. I hope I'm not the only person who does this. 

So here I am, thinking I'm awake, and like I do on most mornings I lean over and grab my phone. I check email, then move on to instagram. I open instagram and I've got a decent amount of new likes, about the same amount of likes I'd receive on one photo.

I don't remember posting any photos though, what was this surge about?  

So I click over to my profile and there sits about 14 new photos that I have no recollection of posting. The photos include a picture of the bandaid on my food, a picture of the bandaid peeled back and the wound on my foot, a photo of a baindaid torn off and lying on the floor...

Essentially, on my Instagram page sat a documentary of the lifecycle of Sarah's bandaid. Each of the 14 photos had a handful of likes. Each of the 14 photos had been posted for several hours. Panic set in and breathing became difficult. Right as I went to check the number of unfollows I'd received, I shot awake. For real this time.

The amount of relief I felt was downright embarrassing. I told CB about how horrible my dream was and he so kindly provided sympathy. By sympathy I mean he died laughing, as he should have. What a ridiculous dream, and what a ridiculous thing to feel relief over. 

Aside from the fact that I'm sure a documentary on the full life span of a bandaid whose work is totally under appreciated in today's society would be riveting, it would have meant losing what I would estimate to be 1,000+ followers. Followers that I honestly worked really hard at getting. Go ahead and judge my anxiety over such a stupid thing, I can take it. I know I'm ridiculous. 

But in the words of the legendary poet, Yo Gotti, "I Love The Gram, I Love The Gram, I Love the Gram... I'm addicted to it, I know I am." 

It is what it is. I love it, I hate it. It's stupid. It's awesome. It's ridiculous. It doesn't matter. It matters. It's just instagram, and I have a blog. It is what it is. 

If we're being honest, I think the dream bandaids represented every weekend morning that I wake up, check instagram and confirm that I didn't post a photo of myself hammered drunk in the front row of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert wearing a Tuxedo T-shirt. What? I like to party.

Or maybe the bandaids represented CB, who I live in constant fear that I'm going to accidentally photograph and place on the internet. 

Alright, you're right. I'm a nutcase. 

In other, far less crazy news, can we talk about my friend Helene real quick? As you know, Helene and I used to be in real life buddies right here in Dallas but then she moved to my other favorite T state. 

Well HELENE launched the absolute COOLEST site for bloggers on the internet yesterday called Blog Boss Babe and I am tickled pink to be a part of the site as one of the mentors. Blog Boss Babe not only offers everything you could need as a blogger from instructional videos on building your blog and social media (pro tip: no bandaid photos) to an online forum and built-in community of literally hundreds of other bloggers. It is hands down the best way to grow your blog and make some new friends while you're at it. 

Plus, for those of you who have already joined, did you know you get an extra 20% off on my blogger templates? Just check out the "discounts" page under the members section! 

You should for sure check it out, Helene worked her butt off on this site and you'll be able to tell right away. So check it out now!