A Fantasy Football Warning From Me To You

By now, it's possible that you might have heard of this crazy little game called Fantasy Football. Fantasy football comes in all shapes and sizes, and is played on a variety of websites like Yahoo, ESPN and Draft Kings. I've been playing Fantasy Football for about 10 years and I'm here to issue a warning if you're thinking about joining a league for the first time. 

Be sure that if you're planning on playing with people you know, like friends or family or boyfriends or husbands, that your relationship with those you are competing against is strong. I'm talking Arnold Schwarzenegger circa 1984 strong. 

If it isn't Arnold strong, you better be ok to kiss those relationships goodbye. 

Let me explain. 

CB and I really don't argue very often. I'm not saying arguing is a bad thing, I've been in relationships where we did nothing but argue, and relationships where an argument never once arose. My relationship with CB in particular though, we just don't argue very often and that works for us. In fact, the one topic that I consistently fly off the handle on is SO RIDICULOUSLY SILLY; What time we are going to eat dinner at night. 

I'm not joking. This is the single culprit for the majority of our arguments. He wants to eat at early bird pricing times, like 5:45pm. I want to eat at 7 or 8, like a normal human. There is a reason they give a discount to people who want to eat at 5:45, because NO ONE wants to eat at 5:45.

So true life, this is what we argue about. Yes I know, ridiculous first world problem.

Well, that was all we argued about, up until Fantasy Football started and I campaigned to join his all guys league. He was my biggest supporter and convinced his friends that I needed IN that league. Half of the friends were good with it -- probably thought I'd leave guys on bye week and keep someone like Jamaal Charles in at running back even though he's on IR -- the other half were simply overruled since CB was the commissioner. I liked his style on that one.

Flash forward to week 11, and I'm in 2nd place. CB's team isn't doing great. I'm not sure what the problem is, and I'll be nice about this because I really think his team is incredible. Oh and the other reason I'll be nice....

I said something mean to my boyfriend about his 1-8 fantasy football team in the heat of the moment, and now we're fighting. FF ruins lives

— Sarah Webb (@iamsarahwebb) November 5, 2015

He's been super supportive, saying multiple times how badly he wants me to win the whole thing. I thought that was actually really sweet. 

THAT WAS UNTIL WEEK 11. Week 11, this week, Sarah vs. CB. I swear y'all it was like someone flipped a switch and this monster took over CB's body. 

The kindness and supportive cheers transformed into recruiting his friends to block my waiver wire picks so that I couldn't get the players I wanted. 

I'm not joking, this kid called up his BROS and formed an alliance, circa 2001 Survivor on CBS. 

The Bro tribe has spoken. 

When I learned that he did this, I flew off the handle and starting saying mean things about his now 2-8 team that he got highly offended at (not sure why, that's literally his record, I had already complimented his lineup) and we spent the rest of the car ride not speaking. 

I was hurt that he would enlist the bro tribe.

He was hurt because he felt like that was a low blow to bring up his record. He was probably right, it was. 

BUT THE BRO TRIBE, THO.

Fantasy Football brings out the worst in people, so beware of participating. Have you ever played the game Sorry! and a significant other intentionally targeted you over everyone else in the game? It's just like that, personal unfavorable targeting from those you love the most. 

This is your official warning, from me to you, sistah. 

It's fun, I recommend it, but just be careful who you play with. 

Please say a little prayer or wish up into that big blue sky today that CB and I make it through the weekend matchup against each other. I really like this kid and I'm hoping I come to you on Monday Tuesday with the same sentiment.