I was chatting with a friend the other day, and it became evident that it might be hard to keep up with all of the things I like and don't like in the sporting world. I'll admit it, I've got a lot of opinions on gameday attire and in-game rituals. Although I shared some don'ts in an old post that made it to Buzzfeed, "The Devil Wears Ziplock," I thought I'd make a concrete list today of all of my personal do's and don'ts for being a sports fan.
As you'll see below, I'm not a total grouch on everything, only the pink jersey!
Do: Temporary Face Tats for Your Team
The temporary face tattoos for your team are a yes for me. Who wouldn't want to display their team's logo right on their face? I know Mike Tyson feels me on this one. Go forth, wear the face tats with pride, I'm good with it.
Do: BYOP, Bring Your Own Pom-Pom
I was never a cheerleader. When I was a kid, my dad took me to sign up for rec-league basketball. When we got there, the signup booths for both basketball and cheerleading were right next to each other. After noticing that I'd been staring longingly at the cheerleading booth, he said I could choose which one I wanted to do. I picked basketball and that was that. My desire to be a cheerleader must never have faded though, seeing as I've always been jealous of the cheerleaders! I don't think I've missed a single episode of DCC: Making the Team since it first aired, thus, I fully embrace the pom-pom for gameday.
Don't: The Wave
No. No to the wave. I hate the wave. I hate the wave so much that I wrote a full post on how much I hate the wave. Please do not participate in the wave, it's a travesty to the sporting world that it even exists. The wave is a don't.
Don't: The Pink Jersey
I'm not talking about the breast cancer awareness month pink accents, those are great. I'm talking about the year-round, pink jerseys that some dude in a corporate office created because he thought the only way women would want to watch football is if they could wear pink while doing it. No. No to the pink jersey. Wear your team's colors. Shirt below can be found
here!
Do: The Kiss Cam
The jumbotron in general is a yes for me. Like most six year olds, my goal for every game I attend is to make it to the jumbotron. The kiss cam though? Man, if I ever made it with CB to the kiss cam I'd die a super duper happy girl. Yes to the kiss cam.
Do: Glittery Accents, As Long As They're Your Team's Colors
Does this one surprise you? I love the sparkly accessories, like koozies or shoes. I was at the Dallas Stars opener last week with my friend Vanessa, and we spotted the coolest pair of green sparkly Dallas Stars logo'd Tom's. Any kind of sparkly accessories, as long as they are your team's colors are DO for me. (Important note: no rhinestones. I draw the line at rhinestones.)
Don't: Wear A Jersey for a Team That's Not Playing
Bonkers. This drives me absolutely bonkers. Even if you're in nosebleeds, those tickets cost you a small fortune. Yet, you've made it clear you DO NOT CARE about either team that's playing. Why are you here? Go home and watch your team's game.
Don't: Be At The Mall, Wearing Your Team's Apparel, When Your Team is Playing!!
Please go home and watch the game. Or go to the bar and watch the game. You cared enough to put the shirt on, knowing that it was gameday. Go watch the game. I'm not sure why I care so much that you're wearing a team's jersey, yet not watching the game, but I do. Now go home, you're making me angry.
Do: Have a Dog That Performs Crazy Tricks With A Frisbee at Halftime
That right there is mesmerizing and I want to watch. Please continue to provide me with this halftime entertainment because I eat it right up.
Don't: Talk Crap To The Opposing Team's Fans
We have to co-exist, so please be polite. I'll be nice to you as long as you're nice to me. Read: I won't say a word to you as long as you don't say a word to me. We have nothing productive to talk about. If your team has a nice play you don't have to get in my face and tell me about it. Trust me, I saw it. Let's just agree to disagree and never exchange words of any kind. It will only go south.
Don't: Heels
No heels at basketball. No heels at football. No heels at baseball, hockey, soccer. No heels, no wedges, no variation on the heel what so ever. And
please, dear Lord, do not try and sell me heels with a Tennessee Power T on the toe. Please stop spending your money to try and promote these to me on facebook simply because I'm a female between the ages of 18-49 who "
likes the Tennessee Volunteers Football Fan Page." No real fan, sitting in section 403 - row 16, wears heels to the game. They just don't. Period. End of discussion. Good day, sir.
And on that note, I'll see you guys Monday. I've gotta go calm down, maybe drink a glass of milk or something. I'm all worked up now.
