The Devil Wears Ziplock

I was doing some research for today's post when I stumbled upon an article that left me nothing short of flabbergasted. I had to check about 4 sources before I began to realize, wow, this is real.

The NFL has introduced a new policy stating that women can't bring purses over a certain size to any NFL game. By over a certain size, I mean larger than a wallet. If you want to bring a larger purse, you can either bring one of the logoed clear bags, or you can bring a ziplock bag.

A ziplock bag. I guess I would recommend freezer proof for women in New England and Minnesota.

Really? Can't wait to roll up to the cowboys game once a month ziplock in hand.

Does this ziplock bag match my outfit? I'm worried that it is so last season?

I messaged Erin yesterday when I first heard this news to get her expert opinion, since she works in the NFL. She actually told me the Bengals would be handing out some of the logoed bags free for the first couple of weeks! I think that is a great gesture, especially in the short term to get the word out.

Although each team will offering freebies in the short term, my biggest issue with this (besides all of my lady stuff in plain view, my debit cards showing for the word to see, my cash floating around the bag for someone to come rob me) is the fact that many women will come to the games unaware of this rule. They then have to go back and put their bag in their car. The cars in the parking lots will be screaming, come break into me, there's purses allllll up in hurr!

Then I got to thinking of several things the NFL should have banned instead of my innocent HandM cross body bag...

1. The Pink Jersey (or any shirt that is not the color of the team)

2. Whatever these fluffy scarf things are

3. The Crop Top Jersey - What am I supposed to do with these? 

And what on earth would anyone in BOSTON do with a crop top in pouring snow, 16 degree weather? Here, you look cold. Try putting on a crop top. 

4. House divided plates - Do you live in your car? Is your car your home? No? Then put your favorite team on your car and let your husband put his favorite on his car. You can hang a poster in the house that says house divided so that I don't have to look at it. Problem solved.

5. 'Your_Name_Here' Personalized jerseys- Who the heck is Big Freddy? Is he the corner back?  Exception: if you made a personalized Leon Sandcastle jersey, that would be awesome. But then you'd have to wear a chiefs jersey and that would be unfortunate for you. 

6. Wearing a team's jersey that isn't playing- i.e. Atlanta Braves jersey at a Oakland Raiders game. Lakers jersey at a Dolphins game... or in this case, a Golden State fan at the Spurs / Heat game.

7. Stupid sayings - I don't want to profess my desire to play the field, hangout in anyones dugout, go all the way and I most certainly don't want to be anyone's halftime show. Unless you enjoy watching a girl consume cheese dip like it is her job and throw back miller lights... in which case, I still won't be wearing that shirt. 

8. Kristen Cavalari's NFL Line- What. Is. This.