Why won't anyone give me free stuff?

How often do you see this?

Care of (C/O) Tory Burch, Hobo, Kate Spade... etc and so on

Here is my dear friend Rachel who blogs at Pink Peonies

Just kidding we have never met each other ever. Nor have I ever interacted or even left a comment. 

I just awkwardly drool over her outfits. And Loubis. And the number of C/O items she has.

Why won't anyone ever give ME free stuff. 

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and dog gone it people like me. 

Why I Deserve Free Stuff:

Girls already want clothes. That is a given. I am getting trying to get girls into watching and maybe even enjoying SPORTS. This is new. If I can increase the number of girls that like going to sporting events, sporting attendance increases. 

You don't have to be able to solve Pi to figure that out.

I'm changing the world here, Obama. 

What to Send:

I am not a fashion blogger. I am not asking for clothes from you Tory. Although I won't rule that out, let's not be rash here. 

Side Note: To whom it make concern at the Victoria's Secret Pink Line:

I'l take all of this // this // this // this

You can leave out the fringe tanks, don't nobody have time for that.

Ok what was I saying?

Oh right, I'm not a fashion blogger. I'm not asking for clothes. (See exceptions above) 

I want TICKETS!!!

Sending me tickets gets you:

1. Unlimited Selfies from the front camera of my iphone

2. Two images of the jumbo tron uploaded to Instagram with hashtag of your choice

3. Six pictures of my beer (one for each beer) - Instagram upload included

4. 8 pics of me throwin a peace sign with your team's court/field in the background - insta upload extra 

5. You may buy me a hot dog

6. One Seventh Inning Stretch (where applicable) jumbotron performance

7. One Kiss cam performance. (Please provide other participant)

8. One game participant. (Preferably the layup for a million dollars game- I get several attempts)

9. Four pictures with your mascot

10. No male cheerleaders please

We good?? Message me for P.O box.

If you need me to travel to your game, that can be arranged. 

You will need to provide: airline tickets (I get the miles though), per diem ($800/day), wardrobe, any overnight accommodations (the W preferred), athlete chauffer to game encouraged.